Self-hosted web push Cloudflare Worker, works on iOS

In an age where the web is supposedly made of agents, urns, and black boxes, the idea of running your own push-notification service on top of a CDN giggle is the kind of reverse-engineering that makes the universe straight and weird. Cloudflare Workers—those 5-microwatt applets scattered across the globe—turn a familiar Web API into a personal notification drone. The commands are written in the network, literally, by binding a URL, a database, and a push handshake: where your browser lives, your code follows. This is the kind of story Weird & Wild loves: the ordinary HTTP header turned into a personal telegram, the edge of the network bending to your whims. Why rent a server when you can rent a chance? And deploy it from your own chair. The source article at kukuroo.cc (and the Hacker News thread at https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=49299667) shows the community hasn’t missed the point: for a handful of embedded systems, this is not $5.99 magic, it’s code. With 28 points and 9 comments, it’s the kind of quiet but mad scramble that precedes a so-called “void” of the existing cloud world. The important nuance is not that it works on iOS—though that is part of it—but that it happens via *other people’s* networks, in a few milliseconds, using the same standards as the centralosity of the biggest data centers. You don’t need a socket for the socket-whistle test; you need a second-story. There’s a secret here about alligned intent: the public cloud is just a heavier decision, and self-hosting is the act of actually scraping your own pockets into the meme. The scission between “site” and “service” is at the bottom of all absurdity: your code is the site, your code is the service, and your code is the push server.